Problem Drinking

Because alcoholism is difficult to define precisely, I prefer the term problem drinking. After all, a problem drinker is simply someone whose drinking causes problems.

Consider those who drive while under the influence. Most of us agree their drinking creates serious problems. We can safely call them problem drinkers. Similarly, those who abuse spouses or children while intoxicated are also problem drinkers.

My first encounter with someone struggling with alcohol was at age six, and the memory remains vivid even now at seventy-eight. Throughout the decades, I’ve witnessed countless instances of people engaging in behaviors characteristic of problem drinking. These experiences have progressively deepened my perspective on alcohol and its impact.

The other day, I heard something I couldn’t verify either way. Still, I found no cause to question it. According to a TV program, during the Vietnam War era, drunk drivers claimed five times more lives than combat did.

I was caught off guard by what I heard. My initial instinct was to believe it. The challenge is that I have no clear path to verify it. If any of you have access to the relevant data, I’d welcome your assistance in tracking down the numbers.

Regardless, I must assume the statement is substantially accurate. If it isn’t, we need clarification. Spreading misinformation isn’t acceptable under any circumstances. Should it prove true, I’d like to incorporate it into my collection of evidence against problem drinking.

That said, I prefer to ground my argument largely in personal observation, particularly when countering the hollow claims I’ve frequently heard in favor of drinking.

In the short term, let’s focus on what’s clear. Countless people have lost their lives to domestic violence—perpetrated by spouses or family members—often fueled by alcohol. I can’t cite exact numbers, but I’d venture they’re far too high. And that’s just the fatalities; it doesn’t account for the countless non-fatal incidents, whether they were ever reported or not.

I’ve also observed a troubling pattern in our culture: there seems to be an expectation that everyone drinks alcohol. This became especially apparent during my time in the Marines, where I witnessed it firsthand.

I was informed unequivocally that drug abuse stands as the foremost challenge facing the Marines. Alcohol represents the primary substance of concern. Senior leadership, particularly general officers, consistently and candidly acknowledge this reality. Yet paradoxically, every Marine installation I visited maintained facilities dedicated exclusively to the purchase and consumption of alcoholic beverages.

Most major organizations host an annual informal gathering called a “beer bust.” While technically optional, attendance is strongly encouraged—and practically required for senior staff. Officially, no one must attend, but declining carries real consequences.

Beyond the beer busts, certain unspoken expectations loom large. Questions inevitably surface: “Why weren’t you at the…?” and so forth. I was repeatedly assured that these gatherings offered plenty of activities outside of drinking. Yet I found myself wondering: what else is there really to do at a drinking party besides drink? And how many times would I need to explain my choice not to drink when people notice my empty hands?

Certainly, while the drinking requirements aren’t stated outright, they’re nonetheless strongly suggested—and consistently so.

For anyone unfamiliar with this principle, consider a straightforward fact: no one has ever become a problem drinker without that first sip—reason notwithstanding. Yet society appears relentlessly committed to ensuring everyone takes it, even those firmly opposed.

In a society where alcohol remains the leading drug problem, it simply doesn’t make sense to encourage drinking—particularly that crucial first drink. We should do everything in our power to prevent it.

The no-ads is working out all right to decrease smoking. Do you suppose it would work for alcohol?

I think not. The alcoholic claims he’s not an alcoholic by saying he can walk away from it any time he wants to. The problem with the problem drinker is that he never wants to walk away. And so the problem drinker never knows if he can quit. He only knows of his success for a day, a week, a month…. It is true he can fail at any time or from anything; perhaps all it takes is an encouragement to go to that beer bash. After all, if he doesn’t go, he will not get the time off as the others. He will be required to work. So it is with society. It does not walk away from the alcoholic drink because the desire is not there and never will be.

Society wants me to take that first drink. Society does not want me to turn my back on it and walk away. Certainly not for all my life.

Then, of all things, I’m the one expected to justify myself—I am frequently asked why I don’t drink, why I do skip the parties while everyone else attends. I’ve never quite understood it. I try to live right and live morally, yet I’m the one fielding endless questions.

Society does not seem to want me to remain sober. It doesn’t seem to want any of us to remain sober. Perhaps that does say a little about our society.

Plan Ahead

What personal mantra or philosophy guides your life?


View all responses


Back in 1967, I entered Marine boot camp—a span of years I’d rather not calculate. Throughout that formative period, our instructors drilled into us a crucial lesson: the importance of planning. Though their methods have likely evolved, I’m confident the Marines continue to champion this principle.


Over the decades, I’ve come to recognize this advice as among the most valuable I’ve ever received. Looking back, I wish I’d embraced it more completely at the time, even though I thought I had.


Here’s the critical point: delay planning, and your options shrink. The longer you postpone it, the fewer choices remain available to you.

Are There Any New Cities?

What’s the best way to explore an unfamiliar city?


I realize that wasn’t what you asked—my apologies. The thought simply crossed my mind. After centuries of growth, most cities have become well-established, and many have rightfully earned their status as historic destinations.


That said, your question brought to mind a brief time I spent in Yuma. The city itself is quite charming, though I wouldn’t suggest visiting during summer. During my several-week winter stay, I found it genuinely pleasant for that season.


During my time in the Marines, duty took me there. Having already seen other desert cities, I wasn’t particularly eager about the assignment. Summer would have driven me to volunteer for kitchen duty just to escape. But January was surprisingly manageable. In fact, I could genuinely see myself enjoying a winter getaway there.


The surrounding areas offer plenty of worthwhile destinations and attractions worth exploring.


One fine day when I had some time off, I decided to take in a movie. I found one in the paper. Not being at all familiar, I made the mistake of assuming that since it was on Second Street, it had to be close to downtown. And it was Yuma. How far would I need to walk, given the size of the city? Well, I found out.


I don’t know how long the street is, but I must have walked many miles looking for that theater. There was not one theater. In fact, after a few blocks, there was hardly anything.


I was about to give up and catch the next bus back to the base when I looked up at a street sign and realized where I might have gone wrong. I was looking at the markings of Second and 3rd. 


After walking one block, I was at the corner of Second and 2nd Avenue. I checked and, yes, there was a First and 1st as well. Strangely, the pattern more or less held up throughout the downtown area.


And so it was I explored an old city that was new to me. And, I’m pleased to report, I also saw the complete movie. Though I can’t remember what it was for the life of me. But I will never forget the way the streets are laid out in the little city of Yuma, Arizona. 

Simple Decision

The genie grants you a wish. What is it?


An end to telemarketing calls—particularly those fraudulent Medicare scams. Receiving twenty-five to thirty daily is excessive. What makes it worse is their recorded messages that play after I pick up. Most frustrating of all, these interruptions have caused me to miss important calls I needed to take. They’ve essentially eliminated any benefit or convenience my phone provides.

It Don’t Surprise Me None

A little over a year ago, I walked into a Wendy’s. Three employees stood chatting while ignoring me—their only customer. I tried twice to get their attention. When they didn’t respond, I waved goodbye and left. I haven’t returned since.

I came across a news story yesterday about one of Wendy’s largest franchises filing for bankruptcy. That said, I’m not entirely surprised. Based on my own experience with their customer service, it appears they may have prioritized other customers.

I came across an article today attributing their difficulties to beef prices. While that’s likely a contributing factor, it hardly accounts for the full picture. Other establishments in the industry are thriving despite the same market conditions.

I do wonder how the other franchises are doing.

A fundamental business truth: no matter how exceptional the product, success remains impossible without adequately solid service. I also observed that seven locations operate in Mississippi, while twenty-four are situated in Tennessee. I suspect several of these fall within the Memphis/DeSoto County region—essentially, my local area. Whenever I drive past one nearby, they appear notably vacant these days. I passed the one just off I-55 recently and observed no activity whatsoever. It strikes me as peculiar, given its proximity to the interstate.

I’m not convinced Dave, the company’s founder, would endorse this direction. Under his leadership, the service was exceptional. This follows a familiar pattern, unfortunately. Numerous businesses have declined once ownership transferred to the next generation.

May I Please Revisit That Exercise Thing

I drafted a reasonably solid post in response to the prompt. Frustratingly, my strongest ideas often surface only after I’ve published. This instance proved no exception—I overlooked one of the most powerful exercises I’ve encountered.

Let me start by explaining that I once weighed between 260 and 270 pounds—perhaps even hitting 280 on occasion. I genuinely attempted to maintain my weight, yet I hesitated to suggest to my wife that I disliked her cooking. Besides, she was an excellent cook.

Then one day, I broke my ankle. What’s the connection? Let me explain. By the time I ditched the crutches, I weighed 220 pounds. My arms had grown much stronger. Now I understand what it’s like for people who use crutches permanently.

A Salad in a Salad

Daily writing prompt
What are your best healthy eating habits?

It may not be the conventional answer, but it’s the one I prefer.

Begin with a basic tuna salad by combining tuna, sweet pickles, celery, and bell peppers. Feel free to adjust the ingredients based on your preferences and what you have on hand. Then fold in a modest amount of mayo or salad dressing, seasoning to your liking.

Toss together a crisp salad with lettuce, cabbage, tomato, and spinach, add some shredded carrots, and finish it off with a generous drizzle of thousand island dressing—my favorite for this part, though I will let you use others.

Mix well, then add a generous scoop of the tuna salad you made into your salad. Whether you fold it in completely or leave it layered is entirely up to you—I’ve enjoyed it both ways and can honestly say they’re both delicious.

I’m not sure this fully qualifies as healthy, but I’m voting for it.

Sorta Depends

Daily writing prompt
If you could start a new business right now, what would it be?

How much imaginary cash are you going to provide me for this imagined business? Money aside I would like to start a hot dog stand.

Hamburger joints are everywhere you look. Hot dog stands, though? They’re few and far between. Want a hot dog? Your best bet is either firing up the grill at home or catching a ball game. Now chicken—ever since the Colonel started frying it, everyone’s jumped on the bandwagon. Walk down any main street in a decent-sized town and you’ll spot competitors on practically every corner.

The biggest challenge in food service is razor-thin margins. You might think you’re profitable until an unexpected bill or tax hits. That’s why I chose hot dogs. Buns, hot dogs, mustard, ketchup, and onions—simple. I sell chips and soft drinks on the side to round things out.

Then all you need is a pot to heat the hot dogs, a cash register, and a location to set up shop.

It’s either that or all-day simmered spaghetti and meat sauce. Spoon it into a paper bowl and watch the profits roll in. No competitors offer it this way.